Enough With the Talking Toe Nails!!!

 

Warning - this is a gripe session - about television commercials.

First, I'm going to date myself by remembering fondly the commercials of my youth.   There were songs - Oh, I wish I was an Oscar Myer Weiner ...  Or Bologna   or Ho Ho Ho Green Giant

or, Libby, Libby Libby on the table, table, table, 

There were exclamations - Anthony!  Anthony! for Prince Spaghetti.

There was hunkalicous!  And romantic! (okay, yeah, I like Tom Selleck, but he gave good commercial!)

Nowadays, I DESPISE most of what I see.  

I am seriously squicked-out by talking open wounds or toe nails, or walking, talking boxes for mail-in poop samples, haunting, stalking digital stomachs, or any talking face dubbed onto a body part like a hand or finger. It doesn't amuse me - it annoys me. 

Don't even get me started on that stupid Bath Fitter commercial where the mom is taking a bubble bath behind the 'daughter spokesperson' and demands 'FRESH towels' while there is a stand of perfectly and artistically rolled towels next to the tub. ::rolls eyes::  (and no matter how hard I tried, I never could get bubbles that Tall and Thick! ) 

Then there are commercials with actors playing annoying problems like dandruff - I guess people think it's funny but I don't. 

But - give credit where credit is due - not all old commercials were palatable - take Slim Jim for example. That was simply freakish and scary.

This one about IT issues  is a toss up between insulting, annoying and WTH? 

You can change a channel to escape a show you don't like, but those commercials follow you everywhere!!!!

Then there are the commercials that think they're being funny but they insult our intelligence.  I've noticed that they believe they can subliminally pass off a suggestion onto viewers thinking they won't catch the subtle nuance endorsing a dubious societal quirk as normal, when it most definitely should not be and isn't. 

Short of sitting in a chair, watching television with my laptop open in preparation for catching a specific commercial when it airs, I'm writing this as a generality and from memory because I don't want to sit and waste more braincells watching a television show JUST for the commercials. All I'm doing  is sharing my opinions about the drivel commercials are plugging into their dialogue or visuals that endorse stupidity of the masses. What they 'think' of as funny, is actually stupidity, the unfunny kind.  The original Three Stooges was smart stupid-funny - they used clever quips and word puns and there was actually a devious intelligence behind a lot of their skits - Paris-sites, Baron of Gray Matter - funny.  Today's commercials can only dream about being clever funny.  Instead they make us out to be idiots.  

The propensity for flooding the airwaves with drug commercials is the stuff of nightmares.  Not the medicines themselves, but all the listed side-effects.  Seriously, some of them, like 'thoughts of suicide', death, heart problems, seizures, etc,, are oftentimes worse that what they're treating. Thing is, are they inundating us with commercials with the purpose of utilizing the masses as further research subjects?  Talk about cheap options for continued drug trials - get the people to willingly submit themselves as unpaid test subjects. That's how watching those drug commercials makes me feel. 

The most egregious are the commercials for movies.  No longer do I see actual hooks to grab a person's curiosity. No longer am I able to get an idea of what the movie is about.  Hardly ever do I see anything rated G or innocently cute, adorable yet intellectual.  What do I see?  Violence. Extreme violence using explosions, guns, physical aggression, anger, vindictiveness, rage, and more gun violence. That's it. That's practically all they show. It's laughable how high-on-their-horses politicians are about gun violence when Hollywood glamorizes and showcases it in a positive light. Need to solve a problem? Use violence. Retribution equals shooting someone. If you're angry, feel slighted or were wronged? Shoot them after beating the snot out of them.  THAT kind of commercial is a constant barrage on television, every danged day. Violence SELLS - movies, newspapers, news programs and television shows. They think guns are the problem? Where the heck do they think the idea STARTS??? It's fed multiple times a day during commercials.

There's more I can say. Perhaps I'll edit this blog post when I see something while I actually have my PC open. I can then provide more specific examples.

Seriously, though. Enough with the stalkeri-sh behavior of inanimate objects and body parts come to life in order to sell us stuff. It doesn't work for me. It turns me off and makes me want to tune out.

I prefer to listen to audiobooks. No stupid commercials. 

And, there is another reason I wanted to do this post now versus later. I saw that Blogger is not going to offer the option of the widget that alerts people who actually do follow this blog, even as sporadic as it is, to something I've posted so it's at least seen, by someone. Once that widget is shut down, it's over, I'll be posting for myself, I guess.  But then again, when I started blogging, I basically was.  Some things seem to come full circle, don't they?