I'm officially a year and a day older. Yeah.
Today was crazy!
We had a wedding to go to at 1PM and before that I needed to clean the house, go food shopping so the sitter and my kids had munchies, come home, make Ham and Pickle for their lunches and then get my new duds on.
The sitter arrived while I was still sprucing up the bathroom.
I finished, threw on my new clothes I got from J C Penny the day before ( ON SALE) and we went out the door.
I felt confident that I had the card, the $ for the gift and the most important thing, the directions to the church.
Well! Wouldn't you know, unseen by me, the directions had fallen out of my purse and were still in the house. We were about 3 miles away when I went looking for them and found they weren't there.
That's when the shit hit the fan.
Seems I'm PMSing and I didn't realize it.
My DH and I don't really fight ... we argue but we're basically civil about it. Not today.
My ADD antics got to him today and it was bitter and angry and very UNcivil.
When we got back home, I raced to where I had my purse on the table and sure enough, there were the directions as plain as day.
I grabbed them, hugged the kids again and off I went.
At that point I was pretty emotional. I Hadn't forgotten them. I Hadn't Messed up. It was a simple ACCIDENT that could have happened to anyone.
I said, "it was an accident, it was right were my purse was. The paper fell out."
The response wasn't what I expected or appreciated and I let loose.
I did something that in 22 years of marraige I'd never done.
I screamed at my DH.
"I wasn't WRONG!!"
Needless to say, the drive was quiet after that. I won't tell you what we said to each other but profanity was never used.
I am not sharing this for you to take sides and say "Awww, Michele" .
No, I'm saying that God still works even when you are angry at yourself and you feel like shutting the world out. You can't keep HIM out.
He works when you least expect him to.
He was working overtime today.
Seems I, due to procrastination, sent in the reply late so my friend had to find a place for us to sit since the seating arrangements had already been done before my reply was received.
We ended up sitting with the BEST people we could have sat with. The people we NEEDED to sit with.
Turns out that this couple has been married for over 35 years and SHE also had ADD.
After questions and answers vollied back in forth it became crystal clear that I have the same issues as her. She has the same problems as me.
We were and are kindred spirits.
She was God send, a gift.
I almost was in tears to hear that the things I do, or in my case DON'T do are inherent in my condition and are not because of laziness, or defects per se and most certainly are not done to be contrary to my very organized and structured husband.
We ranged on topics from our house needing cleaning after our cleaning, our laundry battles, our procrastination tendencies, our forgetting meals in ovens or defrosted food in microwaves, or the fact that we both, BOTH are on the computer a lot more than our husbands are comfortable with. And BOOKS...she's worse than me. Her books have taken over half her basement! I've 10 years to catch up. LOL
The point of this is that after meeting and talking to these people, my husband felt better able to cope with me and I felt better about me.
When I'm PMSing, I am very sensitive and emotional. To say that I was on the road to a depressive episode today is an understatement. I think it's been about a year and 1/2 since I"ve been on one and Praise to God, this one got derailed by being with people who not only understood but are THERE in a way regular folk who have no dealings with ADD could ever understand.
What started out as Hellish kind of day ended up life affirming and positive.
And, I feel loved.
These past two days have been an emotional rollar coaster. Yes I had a wonderful birthday yesterday, but you also know what stressful episode snuck in to keep it interesting.
Here comes today. I was at a low point but now am on the upswing.
You never know what you're going to read when you come to visit me on my blog, do you?
Have yourself a good Sunday and remember, things ALWAYS find a way to get better - because you have someone up there who loves you.