Saturday, June 14, 2008

Male Double Standard of Youth

I was reading Daisy's blog post and although I think it has many extremely funny elements, I was prompted to share this:
First read her Male Bashing post.

Then, this is what I wrote in response:

I can't believe they would SAY That!
And yet, you know, I do.
Here's something in the recent news. I'm going from memory here from this week.

A mother allowed her teenage son to invite some buddies over for a sleep over.

She had another mother, a friend of hers, come over help out I guess.

According to the radio station I listened to...the 15 - 16 yr olds were treated to two very horny mothers who got it on with ALL of the teenagers at the sleepover as soon as they walked in the door. Five I think.

The ONLY reason anyone found out is after the debauchery was over, one young man 'felt guilty' and confessed to his dad or parent.

The thing is, the DJ invited comments on air. A 23 yr old male said
WOW, that rocks!
I'd have never left!
I'd have thought that was GREAT.

The DJ're too young to understand about being a parent, but think about yourself in 20 years ... how would you react if YOUR son came and told you?

The 23yr old said:
I'd give him a Hi Five!
I'd get the woman's number.
I'd Celebrate and tell him he was so lucky.

That caller was totally accepting of the situation and indeed endorsed it.

Then the DJ asked ..well, what if it were your DAUGHTER and she had sex with the father at the party.

"Oh, well, I'd shoot him.


And then the DJ said...."But think about this...If the mothers in question looked like... (don't remember who was used as example.) Angelina Jolie or Cindy Crawford, you probably feel good BUT if the woman looked like Rosanne or Rosie, I'm guessing you wouldn't be so happy about it."

I don't remember the guy answering one way or the other on that one....

The thing is, Me, as a mom... WOULD be upset.

First, They were..helloooo! MINORS.
Hellooo! Don't you think it's gross that the SON of one of the women was there for all of this? Who got it on with HIM? The mother's Best FRIEND???
What did it do to this young man's psyche seeing his MOM have sex with his buddies?
And women who abuse their position of trust - especially the position of MOM, are totally trash.
And if they get off on young boys... what is the age cut off for pedophiles ...and why do they have to be only MEN? ((and how come female teachers who have sex with young students aren't ever labeled Pedophiles????)

Some of Daisy's male commenters sounded like that 23 yr old. Not having lived enough, not having the benefit of a mature understanding of LOVE, which is NOT the same as lust, they have grandiose illusions of their place in the world and a woman's place in it.

Life, the ultimate teacher, will give them a smack down one of these days.

Yes, Daisy's blog post was funny. I also think it's funny that someday, they are going to eat crow, humble pie and will jump through hoops to appease their woman.

At that point, they won't be seeing with their eyes, but with their heart.

So when their woman is hefty because of a debilitating disease, side effects from meds, thyroid problems or whatever, the LAST thing they'll be thinking of is weight. The men who wrote in to Daisy? Have NO clue! We can laugh, but I pity them too.

Just my two cents.


Annalee Blysse said...

This was an interesting topic to run across.

The other day this new employee (man) said something I so completely obnoxious at work. He was taking about women needing to be attractive if he's going to be able to get it up. I'm using more polite language than he was. I'm not thin, and part of me wondered if he wasn't making a comment because he noticed I was fat.

I didn't say anything though because he had the odor of someone that does meth and I figure he is a bit insane. As it turns out I woke up the next morning with bloody mucus, so I really was exposed to something toxic the day before.

But I had watned to say something because I got a good look at him. He is about five foot tall and his butt is about five inches wide.
was a tiny guy. Not just tiny but TINY. Part of me wanted to say something like ... you must be afraid of a woman over size twelve because a woman over size twelve doubles your weight.

I can already tell he won't last long at work though because he wouldn't shut up about anything. If an idea popped into his head, he shared it.

Michele said...

Wow! and HI Annalee~!
So glad to see you!
Life has been keeping you busy I bet.
Me too.

That guy does sound like a real idiot and sort of scary.

I hope you don't have any lasting medical issues from that toxic cloud you got off of him.

Be careful, Annalee!


Brandy said...

Those same men that lambasted women and Daisy in particular, will be alone. And stay that way.

Anonymous said...

Hi Michele. I wandered over your way from a the blog of a friend (Northern Misfit) who links to you, read the essay you linked to and, since I'm a guy, I'd like to add my two cents.

I'm 42 years old. I'm often taken for about 30, partly because I've just always looked young, partly because of the residue of an athletic younger life... though that is starting to change (I've put on a few extra pounds in the last few years; I'm still more trim than many men my age, but not what I was).

Another significant feature of my life history, especially when younger, is that I've always been a very sexually active, very sexually driven, man. I've had a handful of serious relationships, and a few times where I sort of withdrew for a while, but at other times it's no exaggeration to say that I've lived like a porn star. In fact, after one relationship crashed to an ignominious end many years ago I deliberately set out to live exactly that way, and succeeded wildly for several years. Much envy was expressed by most of my male friends and a couple of female friends.

There was no bitterness involved in doing so, no disguised hatred of, or loathing for, women; I was simply having an enthusiastically good time with women who had the same goal. And I have no regrets. And I was not avoiding relationships, I simply had come to accept that I wasn't going to have the life-long kind that so many of my friends did and resolved to enjoy myself in lieu of one. I was content.

I often got the comment "You get lucky more than any guy I know!", to which I was quick to offer the following correction - "No. I'm not getting lucky. I'm just getting laid." Which usually earned me a confused frown...

(You probably have an idea where this is going, don't you?) ;-)

And then one day I got pitched a blind date by some friends, agreed to it to get them to shut up, and as the day approached I told some other friends about it, who said "Oh! Her! We know her! She's great! Your free-wheeling bachelor days are over; you're going to marry her!"

Ha, ha. Right.

Whoops. I did!

My wife and I have been together for over four years now, monogamous since day one, and she's marvelous. She's tall, strong, smart, fierce, brave, sexy, and sometimes really difficult. But every relationship is. Part of success seems to be that neither party is willing to easily throw in the towel; imagine that ;-). And I certainly don't imagine that I have a guarantee of easy-going happiness forever, we merely have a fair and honest chance at a good relationship that works for us both. And that's enough.

Men and women are very much alike, actually: Some people get lucky and find a good life-long partner right away. Some people take a while. Some people never do. Some people are alone through no real fault of their own. And some people, like the men in the pitiful comments in that essay, simply don't have in them to BE a good partner. And some people, if they don't already know me, don't believe the man described above is real, and that's okay too.

To the men out there, to those commenters, I'd say this - I've known a helluva lot of women. Some good, some bad. Some sane, some psycho. Some smart, some stupid. Some supermodel hot, some plain-Jane (careful! You'd be surprised sometimes who's hotter in the sack!). Some right, some unbearably wrong...

... and in the end, I just plain got lucky.

Luck is a big part of it. Luck is the first part of it. The other part is being willing to do something about it when you recognize it.

That list of contrasts up there applies to us guys just as much as to women, you know. Where do you fit on that list? Got the balls to face up to yourself and your situation?

Maybe you'll live a pornstar life. Maybe you won't. Maybe you'll get lucky early. Maybe you'll be alone for along time. Maybe you'll choose the wrong partner. Maybe you'll BE the wrong partner.

There are plenty of women with some serious issues; I of all men know that. And there's nothing you can do about them except maintain minimum safe distance. But bitching and whining about the fact that women who look like models aren't sucking you off right now hardly does you credit, does it?

So; guys - Who are you? Who have you been?

Who do you want be?

And watcha gonna do about it?

Here endeth the speech. Hi, everybody!

Michele said...

This is the first time you've ever visited me, I think!

Thank you and welcome!
extrememly well written comment!

I'm glad you found your life partner and your story was sort of romantic. I think so anyway.

I also appreciate your opinion as you were well spoken, insightful and just plain amazing. I'm hoping Daisy sees your comment here because it is WELL worth reading.

And P.S. ... I'm older than you!

and P.s.s. - those other commenters should take lessons from you.