Thursday, November 10, 2005

Ode to a Potato-oh no.....


Oh, yes. Time for a spud "ode". Another wonderful email came my way, so I figured, "heh, why not?" What could I possibly say about a POTATO??

THE POTATO

Well, Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other, and finally they got married, and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam.'

Of course, they wanted the best for Yam. When it was time, they told her about the facts of life.

They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed,and get a bad name for herself like
'Hot Potato,' and end up with a bunch of Tater Tots.

Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her!

But on the other hand she wouldn't stay home and become a Couch Potato either. She would get plenty of exercise so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring cousins.

When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out for the hard-boiled guys from Ireland.

And the greasy guys from France called the French Fries.

And when she went out west, to watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped.

Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate with those high class Yukon Golds, or the ones from the other side of the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks that say, 'Frito Lay.'

Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U.(that's Potato University)so that when she graduated she'd really be in the Chips.

But in spite of all they did for her, one-day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Tom Brokaw.

Tom Brokaw!

Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset.
They told Yam she couldn't possibly marry Tom Brokaw because he's

just.......

Are you ready for this?



***********A COMMON TATER!!!
Shhh., stop banging you head against the wall.....it wasn't that bad, was it????

On to "Googling a Potato":
I have to say....Cute Potato didn't generate much. At least not in potatoes. I saw, CATS, DOGS, WEIRD PUMPKINS And Sylvester Stallone in a Race Car Helmut....HELLO! What does A Potato and Sylvester have in common????! Your conjecture at this point is as good as mine.

Scary Potato didn't well....scare me. He was one tough spud.....but, I can handle that.


In fact..this google search has presented many challenges.
I tried Alien Potato, and Dangerous, silly, goofy...OK, so I have some time on my hands........*grin*




I will admit...I was left scratching my head while being totally perplexed as to the connection between an Alien Potato and a Martial Arts Monk...seriously!




What the H...???

So , without further ado..... potatoes that couldn't escape my search!!

We have, your regular Couch Potato....and we All know how unhealthy that it......so What would get a potato off his Couch??? Well, *giggle* Seeing this big Bad-a$$ dude might....It would me!! LOL (psst remember Gamorah from Godzilla fame??) That's One HUGE turtle!


If Couchie doesnt' move, he might end up as......




oooooh! Pass the ketchup.

Of course SOME spuds aren't duds,....and they'll let you know.
























I din't know that potatos were patriotic either. I have a deeper respect for our fellow tubers now.


But for every democracy...we have our bad guys out there. The ones who want to rule the galaxy!!!! And we have our heroes who stand up against their tyranny.....
Meet: Darth Tater and his side kick, Stormtuber...scary.







Duke Spudwalker was no where to be found....that's because he was seduced by the dark side of the force... ...
He'd better watch out for those little swimmers!


How could our hero be led astry? Must have been the vile influence of this smuggled in movie onTaterine..


It even had the Royal Potato Seal of approval...Oh My! What scandal!



But all in all...I'd say potatoes aren't the most stimulating bunch of vegetables......but they try. I guess this ODE is pretty large. Larger than your willing to suffer through...sorry 'bout that..but this is going to have to keep for a few days.. Going to see Santa Claus. Really!... He gives me candy canes. Well one actually ...I've not been THAT good...*wink* Let the wierd and wonderful potato have the last word from the
Twilight Zone!!!!

This kinda freaks me out, ya know?

I'm still trying to figure out if the faces are carved in, Photoshopped or are we seeing retribution by the Sidhe????
*shudder*

May your mashed potatoes never revolt!!!

5 comments:

Brandy said...

You have a sick and twisted mind. We must be realted. My kids have Darth Tater. That last one is a little freaky. Have fun on your visit to Santa, and put in a good word for me please!

Michele said...

*woo-hoo* Brandy, it would be fun to be related to you.
Twisted or not *giggle*

Thanks...I guess I'm gonna have a long list for Santa this year...:-)

You know what's also weird and wacky about the last pic? I have the Same Mixer And Potato Peeler....very creepy.*shudder*

Michele said...

Just testing an HTML thingy

Gregg said...

Michele-

I was at a youth group getaway as a teen and they put us into one of those through group team building and leadership execises. One of the execise was to work as a team and figure out how to get a straw to pass completely through a potato without using any other tools.

One jewish american princess looked bored and poked the straw into the bottom of her potato and cut out a small chunk. Then she shouted "this is stupid". The moderator came over and told her that she has to figure out what she has in common with the potato. She looked at him and shouted,

"I have nothing in common with this potato. It has a hole in its bottom that leaks gooey liquid when I poke it with the straw"

The room fell silent.

-gregg

B.S. By the way, you get the straw to pass through the potato by covering one end with your finger. The air pressure holds the straw stiff and it goes right through the potato.

Annalee Blysse said...

Darth Tater! I saw him at work last night for the first time. That post the other night had to do with that Darth Vader toy.

PS - RE: Dara Joy... think I'll order her book from that Wisconsin bookstore eBookisle that hosted a contest I participated in.