Thursday, February 01, 2007

You think your kids have trouble?

Before I update my post, I'd like to once again thank author Kim Howe for giving me the chance to interview her. I had a lot of fun with the process.

Please readers, consider voting at the American Title III contest website. Every vote counts and after reading the entries, I really DO believe Kim's entry is stellar. *ahem* At least,that's my opinion. *grin*

Now for a new post:

All of the parenting How-To books talk about the trials and tribulations of our children trying to make friends while simaltaneously learning the social lessons to accomplish that feat. Many times they can only learn by doing.

Excuse me but, what about the PARENTS? I think we need lessons too.

What is the edicate for two adults meeting blindly over the phone because their two kids decided they wanted a play date?

Such was my case last Thursday.
My son called her son.
Within seconds, the phone is thrust in my face,

"Here Mom. You gotta talk."

"Talk? Talk about what? To who?"

"His Mom."

Totally bemused and confused I make small talk while rapidly scrambling to rearrange my mental schedule to make this playdate workable.

It was decided that the playdate would happen that Saturday afternoon. Morning was out because of a family obligation. (See my post about Reflection)

So, Saturday afternoon creeps towards us, my kids alternately bouncing from window to window, determined to be the first to spot the arriving guest.

Except the guest never shows.
No calls.

Being the good Mom, I call and I get this man who says, "She's not here".
"Well, she was supposed to bring her son to play with mine for 1:30. I thought if she needed directions or ..."

"Can't help you, she's not here, don't know where she is."
Hang up.

Well! That was a surprise and a major disappointment for my kids.

A few hours later I call again and ask for her. This time I get a younger male.

"She's not here."

'OH! Well, no problem. Is it alright if I leave a message for her?"

"Sure!" was the enthusiastic response AND THEN HE HANGS UP ON ME!!

Shocked again.

When my son goes back to school, I asked him if he saw the boy. He said "yes."
Of course I asked him why they never showed up.

He was told that "they were sick." "They" being mother and younger sister.

But that doesn't make sense does it? Why was I told both times I called that "she wasn't there"? What's wrong with telling me they were sick? I mean, it's a perfectly normal and legitimate reason for not coming on a playdate, right?

Guess what?
Today, a week later, my son comes and tells me the "REAL" reason why they didn't come over.

During the conversation, I mentioned RELIGION!!!!

That's all.

I guess that is enough to not only prevent her son from playing with my son, but to have the discourtesy of not bothering to call to tell me and my son that the play date was cancelled.

A whole Saturday afternoon was wasted when we could have done something as a family.

So, my question for you.

If someone mentions religion, is that enough to boycott a playdate?
And is lying to children and other adults justified because of it?


Dru said...

First of all, the mother was rude in not calling. What if she was in an accident, you would have never known.

I think it was rude of her to use the mention of religion to cancel. If she had a problem with it, then she should have said something to you while you both were on the phone. The fact that her son knew the reason for not showing up tells me she talked about it among her family.

I don't think lying justifies anything. Everyone is different and you should respect the person and yourself to be honest.

Brandy said...

I have no problem with religion in a discussion, even if is a religion different from mine. I do infer, politley that we are () and that usually ends that type of discussion. The woman was rude, as were her whole family, not to politley tell you, even, that they had other plans. She could have just asked that you not discuss any topics of that nature around her child. The idiocy and ignorance of others is just questionable in this day and age.
I feel so very bad for your Son. That his hopes were dashed because a parent couldn't be polite....

Bailey Stewart said...

You already know what I think of the situation. *whack*

Michele said...

Thanks, Dru.
I appreciate you not only reading this but giving insight.
I guess in the long run, she did us a favor. Obviously, this isn't a role model I want my kids exposed to.

Brandy, your common sense response is practical and smart. Too bad you live so far away, darn it!
My son seems to be OK. At this point, I'm more upset than him.

Bailey! Yep I do.

RAzzzzberry back at ya!

Jill Monroe said...

Goodness, no - this is no reason to be rude. I'm so sorry this happened to you, but it can be a nice teachable moment for son.

I live in the Bible belt, so my experiences are probably a little different. In fact, usually the kids invite each other to things going on at their church - Vacation Bible School in particular! I think my kids go to at least 3 different VBS in a summer.